苹果表诞生后，国外科技段子手们也是疯了
Duang的余热还未消，裙子的颜色还没整明白，今天早上一睁眼，各大社交网站已经被Apple Watch惨无人道的攻陷了。这潮流太快，我不敢看……这一次“一年二度的苹果盛会”简直是国内外科技段子手的期中考试。除了看国内小伙伴们欢脱花样吐槽，国外段子手们也是纷纷绞尽脑汁、不甘示弱，撸起胳膊齐上阵。总让人觉得，也是时候搞一个「中外段子手联谊赛」了。Buzzfeed网友控告说：苹果表简直是20年前《神探加杰特》中的同款盆友们，你看过《Inspector Gadget/神探加吉特》吗？（暴露年龄了真不好意思）Apple Watch简直是仿照片中小Penny戴的同款啊！！时尚时尚最时尚！http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe690076202.gif1、首先，Penny的手表是可以打电话的！（First of all, like the Apple Watch, Penny could make calls with her watch.)http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe67e98d3de.gif2、视频通话毫无压力。(Even video calls!）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe67f6e2be6.jpg3、手表和其他设备也能同步。（She could sync her watch with her other devices.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe687212c10.gif4、苹果表你有吗？Penny表是能发射激光武器的！（But unlike the Apple Watch, Penny’s watch has a fucking laser beam!）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe684fcf8a5.gif5、当然，开个门这么简单的事情才不值得大肆鼓吹呢。（Which can be used to remove whole doors, or to pick any lock.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe688a85d21.gif6、闪光灯也是基本标配啊。（And check out the flashlight feature.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe68977d7ee.jpg7、逆天了！Penny表还能实现追踪功能！（Penny’s watch could even be used as a tracer!）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6903d862c.gif8、你看，Penny在定位她叔叔的位置。（Look how she uses it to precisely locate her uncle.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe68c7baea3.gif9、“隔空取金属”这种事情也是高效能磁铁轻松松实现。（Need to get something metallic from across the room? No problem! Penny’s watch has a high-power magnet feature.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe68e0eae38.gif10、当然，最重要的是，Penny表甚至还能探测放射物……看来生化部队要失业了。（And best of all, it detects radioactivity!）所以你觉得，Apple Watch和Penny表究竟哪个屌？当然Twitter上的#花式炫富#大赛又开始了！（假装我有一块Apple Watch）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe69ad7525d.pngApple Watch不就是阉割版的iPhone吗？我给绑上不就行了！http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe69aeca440.png小学门口地摊同款 多彩颜色供君选择http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6a7ed1fa5.png这才是货真价实的“苹果表”http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe69b8ea13c.png《Apple Watch从没钱买到速成》嗯~每天换一款 饿了直接啃一口http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe69b27c902.png想必是过两天新表情emoji新表情又上线了吧 #成功装逼get√#热心网友总结了：18K金Apple Watch会帮你减肥的7大原因http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6bb68e2dd.gif1、为了躲开小偷的追击，你得一直跑啊跑。这要感谢“富豪之友”小金表，为你燃烧了卡路里！（Running away from pickpockets burns a lot of calories.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6ba9d4c45.jpg2、你如果选择用现金购买，拎着1万美元的钞票到Apple Store也不亚于举重了。（If you pay for it in quarters, that’s about 125 pounds. Lift heavy, lose fast!）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6bebd5901.gifhttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6bf31ad2b.gif3、为了发挥小金表的价值，你总会自觉的、一次次撸起袖子，不厌其烦的向伙伴们展现那一抹耀眼的金色。于是，终于练成结实发达的麒麟臂！ （Constantly pushing up your sleeve so people can see your watch = your new favorite arm workout.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6d1057125.gif4、【每日N*N次擦亮表盘有氧运动】成就GET√ （Polishing that shiny, shiny gold watch is some legitcardio.)http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6cee6d0ad.jpg5、买了18K金小表表之后，是彻底没钱再去下馆子腐败了吧。乖，自己下碗清汤面吃吧！（You won’t be able to afford to eat at restaurants ever again, so you’ll be forced to cook more of your own meals at home.）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6cef85d99.jpg6、啥，还想买零食小吃？默默空瘪瘪的钱包，饿着肚子洗洗睡吧少年。听，那是你脂肪燃烧的声音。（Actually, you won’t be able to afford most groceries either. Watch the weight just melt off!）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6cfd1b731.gif7、最重要的是买了手表之后，要买车的买不起车了，有车的供不起车了。只能迈开步子走出去吧，每日1万步的运动目标简直是分分钟搞定。小心走太快，扯到表带了。（And you’ll probably have to give up your car (too expensive)…but walking to work is a GREAT way to get those 10,000 steps in.）还有网友指出：
你错了！世界第一款苹果手表20年前就已经诞生了！http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6d7d763bc.jpgApple Watch可不是苹果第一款手表哦，这个才是哦。（看到熟悉的彩色苹果标志了吗）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6d7d04f36.jpg1995年在发布Macintosh 7.5版本系统时，这块手表是官方赠送的赠品之一。（它竟然是传统的机械表…）http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6d8de3b90.jpg苹果公司等了二十年终于等到这一天，推出一款“走时准的苹果电子表”，这难道不是再逗我？谁又能想到，当年作为赠品的它，竟然华丽转身成为了新一届的“富豪之友”？据说这里是检测自己是否有资格购买苹果表的问卷http://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f684c13d.jpghttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f688de15.jpghttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f68dd1fa.jpghttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f6929b89.jpghttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f6970c27.jpghttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f69bd6f4.jpghttp://leiphone.qiniudn.com/uploads/new/article/600_600/201503/54fe6f6a19b8d.jpg总结下来还是：欲买苹果表，请三省自身，富否？富否？富否？转自：雷锋网
我问了自己那些问题后。。。非常坦然的接受“我穷我自豪，买啥不买表”的事实 麻醉针都没有 差评 这段子不错。 笑点好多~ Ash 发表于 2015-3-10 18:01
麻醉针都没有 差评
激光武器功能没有~差评 janehye 发表于 2015-3-10 17:58
我问了自己那些问题后。。。非常坦然的接受“我穷我自豪，买啥不买表”的事实 ...
我看到第1个已经放弃~我穷我自豪 革新性的可食性好评23333333
貌似这么些个月过去，除了出了个真·土豪金版本，并没有什么新功能的样子 233333333333 66666666666666
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